I can't help but smile thinking about where Jamie and I were just a few months ago. Knowing our first child was on his way, we knew our life was about to change drastically (in a number of ways). We knew Jamie would need to find a new job which would most likely involve us moving to a new place and starting a new chapter.
Although on the outside it may have appeared stressful going through such big life changes all at the same time, Jamie and I were confident that everything was happening just as it should. And now here I sit in a new town, in a new home, feeling extremely at peace, loved and blessed by God (maybe a bit uncomfortable, but I think that comes with being 3 weeks away from my due date!) Simply put, God has done it again.
His faithfulness has always prevailed in our lives, individually and together as a couple. Those of you who know us well will be able to testify to this. This time around, what could have been an incredibly stressful few months has actually been one of the most calm and blessed seasons of my life thus far.
I remember thinking towards the end of May how stressful it was going to be completing my diploma in theology, whilst packing and getting ready to move, whilst 'bare foot and pregnant'. However, to my total surprise, it was easy, straightforward, and exciting. We got all of our assignments finished, passed our second years, and moved less than a week later. No hiccups, no problems--only blessing.
Before Jamie applied for the youth worker position in Hucknall, God spoke powerfully to me through a few verses in the Bible...
"To open doors before him that gates may not be closed: I will go before you and level the exalted places, I will break in pieces the doors of bronze and cut through the bars of iron, I will give you the treasures of darkness and the hoards in secret places, that you may know that it is I, the Lord, the God of Israel, who call you by name." (Isaiah 45:1b-3)
After reading these verses, my heart was flooded with an inexplainable peace about our future in Hucknall, though Jamie hadn't even yet interviewed for the post. God gave me peace about where He was leading us and reminded me that I could trust Him fully in this.
Fast forwarding a bit...
I remember the day Jamie got the call back. He had been selected for the post after the interview process. A few more details had to be put into place but it seemed as though he had the position. That same day as I was clearing through files on my laptop I came across a conversation Jamie and I had had over the internet back in 2008. We were not dating at the time, just good friends.
The conversation was all about how Jamie wanted to be a youth worker in a church someday. My response was one of excitement for him as I told him I thought he would be really good at that, followed by, "It'll be exciting to hear in the future how God uses you in that." Jamie (being Jamie) just laughed it off as if it was crazy and never going to happen. Little did we know what God had up His sleeve.
Here we are nearly 5 years later, married, our first child on the way, and Jamie has just become the new youth worker at Watnall Rd. Baptist Church in Hucknall, England. Does God have a sense of humour or what?
What an amazing God we serve!
As I sit here in the early hours of the morning, wide awake with a beautiful little boy stretching busily within me, I feel overwhelmed by the goodness and love of God. I'll admit, Jamie and I are used to life being a struggle. We are more used to things being difficult than going smoothly or in a straightforward manner, though it sounds strange. I am a doer. I struggle daily with feeling as though I need to do more for God or suffer more for Him, as though I need to earn His favour and love. This is something God has been challenging me on for a number of months now. The problem is, I became a servant of God before I came a child of God and I can acknowledge that now.
But for once, I can say I think I'm starting to understand this whole 'child thing'. I am a child of God. He is my heavenly Father who loves me completely, regardless of what I do for Him. Sometimes He doesn't want me to 'do' anything, He just wants me. And He wants me to be me. Being pregnant has taught me a lot about God's love for me as His child; I'm sure being a parent will teach me more and more.
I love my son completely and I have not even met him yet. He has done nothing to earn my love or to make me love him less. As I've felt these feelings for my unborn son, I've realised that this is how God feels about me. And as I have learned to accept this, life has never felt more peaceful for myself and our growing family. God is teaching me to embrace His blessings and to enjoy them. He has reminded me that He is a good God and not just a God who walks with us through hardship and suffering. He is loving and His blessings are all around us. Although it is always strange going through change and hard to leave people behind in the places we've been, I couldn't be more excited for this new chapter ahead.
I know God is faithful. He has proven His faithfulness time and time again and He has fulfilled the promises of His word to us, yet again.
Next up...giving birth! (Don't worry, the blog to follow will have much less detail I'm sure!)
Blessings to you and thank you for reading my ramblings,
Rachel
I love that coming to understand child of God part. I should rewrite that sentence to make sense but I wont. I see being a child of God in two ways. One, scripture says, is when we come to know God we become His child. That's the ordinary one that seems easy to swallow. But in another way as God's creation I see every man as a child of God. I see people living in the blessing of how God created them even as they never meet Him. God given talents poor out of them like a water fall while never giving Jesus a second thought. Not only that, but I see God bless these most ugly, furthest from the kingdom people in amazing ways. And I see God leave some of the spiritually richest people destitute and broken. Somehow, in all of that, buried deeper than deep is a love beyond measure. A love that knows when to bless and when to allow curse. And somehow there I find peace.
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